Why Doing Inner Work is Critical Before Setting New Year's Resolutions
Go ahead, take a swig of champagne, toast the New Year and make those resolutions.
Even though promises to ourselves might give us a sense of self-satisfaction in the moment, the tradition of making New Year's resolutions doesn't necessarily benefit us in the long run.
I find with my clients that resolutions are a way for them to achieve hope or to fine tune intentions and set a clear goal for their wants and wishes for the year. But failure at losing that unwanted weight, or not finding a better paying job can have a devastating effect in people's self-esteem, making New Year's resolutions "unhealthy".
Sometimes the results of ones resolutions can't always be quantifiable and therefore hard to measure as a success. Resolutions, especially ones that are shared with family and friends place added pressure on us, meaning failure to achieve the resolution can lead to deep self-esteem and self-failure mindset.
We make resolutions in those heady optimistic days of the New Year because something is missing within ourselves, something is out of alignment and we're trying to find ourselves, to find ways to accept ourselves, to find meaning.
Most times it fails because we haven't done the inner work; we haven't done the inner healing. The key is to build a healthy relationship with yourself first and then perhaps look at exercising, financial management, relationships, whatever area you desire to improve in your life.
Now, let's add in the global pandemic, which could very well impact resolutions this year. With everything we have experienced, people want more meaning in their life and a more sustainable work/life balance now, particularly since we have been isolated and restricted by this new norm of having the two merged together for so long. As a result, we're rally starting to see what matters most, meaning so many people now wanting to work less, wanting to travel more, realizing family plays a richer part in our loves. People are changing and I believe the pandemic is healing to create a change that is necessary.
The uncertainty of the pandemic, and ever-changing health and safety protocols, can wreak havoc with our determination to achieve our goals. For example, if we intend to get fit and suddenly the gyms are no longer open due to an outbreak or new variant, we then in that moment through external source fail our resolution.
My advice is to start with small, concise mini goals and resolutions that can easily be achieved within your own mindset or within your own home. For example, every day I must say thank you at every given opportunity, or I must tidy my room at least two times a week. These are easily obtainable and therefore give us a gentle emotional boost every time we are successful.
Don't set yourself up to fail immediately; don't try to climb the mountain but take small steps. Set an intention that is more powerful than the problem itself. Instead of looking at weight loss, look at well-being. Instead of looking at financial success or a career that has more financial abundance in it, look at freedom.
Are you looking to make a big impactful change in your life this year, but not sure how to take those baby steps that are achievable? Get my new Transform: The Habit Change Journal. It's the perfect sidekick to finally taking meaningful action on your self-improvement goals in every area of your life—health, money, love/relationships and your career. It offers simple steps to create big change in your life by focusing on a few new habits each month. By the end of the year, all of those small changes add up to big, beautiful and impactful changes in your life!